A permanent reminder 

This afternoon I got a new tattoo. It’s been something I’ve been thinking about for a long time…years in fact. After my first inking I promised myself I would think long and hard if I ever wanted another tattoo…because let’s face it the first one was spontaneous, meant nothing and I got it just because it was cool. Yes…I have a tramp stamp! ūüôą

Moving on swiftly….my second one was thought about. Two years I had it on mind in fact. But again it was another spontaneous moment when I was loving life as a backpacker and I was sat in a bar with my lovely friend Ashleigh on the island of Koh Phangan in Thailand and we decided to go get tattoos. And that’s exactly what we did! Thankfully I’ve never regretted it. I still love it to this day. 

For a while I wanted another tattoo. And for years it was always an elephant. I love elephants. I love how beautiful they are, how peaceful they are and what they represent in my religion. But I was never 100% convinced…because I couldn’t decide what kind of elephant and where I would even have it. 

So that idea came and went… in more recent years I’ve loved the idea of a lotus flower. I chose it as my image for my blog for what it represented. The lotus flower has many meanings, but for me it symbolizes being reborn…finding life again after a very murky and muddy existence. Because that’s where I was. In the mud. And I think I’ve finally found my way again. 

So that’s what I decided on. But I wanted to incorporate one more thing. The semi colon. An every day punctuation mark that has become an international symbol for suicide awareness. It represents the pause in a sentence…and in the world of mental health it represents a pause in someone’s life…but a life that carries on. 

I don’t want to or need to explain my choices. But for me these two symbols represent a part of me and my life and that is why I chose to have them placed on me as a permanent reminder.  

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The karmic universe and me

I had a really interesting day yesterday. Me and my family boarded a very early morning (mouse infested) train to Mumbai to spend the day with my Dad’s Reiki Master.

My Dad got into reiki a few months ago, initially to heal himself but now he is spreading the reiki love and healing many other things including us and our minor ailments. I didn’t really know much about reiki until a few months ago, other then it being some sort of spiritual alternative medicine where by energy is¬†channelled¬†through a persons hands to heal stuff. I think it’s a bit like what Mr Miyagi does to Daniel Son at the end of the first Karate Kid movie when he gets injured during the All-Valley Karate tournament. Daniel Son then goes on to defeat the baddy from the Cobra Kais and wins the tournament….but that is nothing to do with anything. I just love that movie! ūüôā

Anyway, where was I?! Yeah, so we decided we’d all like to meet this guy and find out more about reiki and whilst there get our chakras balanced. Chakras are energy nodes in our body that run from the base of our spine to the top of our head. Each chakra corresponds to¬†distinguishing¬†characteristcs and an aspect of consciousness. I don’t want to go into too many details here and explain all there is to know about your chakras but basically if your chakras are blocked or out of balance it can lead to certain illnesses or mental imbalances. So we wanted to get ours checked, unblocked and get the energy flowing just as it should be.

The process was some what strange. I had to lie down while different chakra stones were placed on me and the healing hands got to work. At first I expected to just slip into a relaxed state and eventually fall asleep. But that didn’t happen. It’s hard to put into words really. I was aware of the noises and what was going on around me even though I had my eyes closed but at the same time my mind was also elsewhere. A bit like being in a semi dream state. And what felt like 10 minutes actually lasted 45!

After this he explained that my root chakra was partially blocked and because of this I may have been experiencing fear and low levels of confidence. He was pretty spot on in to be honest. I’m feeling a million times better then say 6 months ago but with me going home next week without my folks, the thought of being on my own and facing the dreaded job hunt¬†etc. has got me a little scared. As for the confidence. Same. I’ve got enough to get me thinking positively again, but I think I’m still ¬†a bit of a way off from being completely happy in myself. He also said that my crown chakra ¬†was almost completely open. Apparently a blocked crown chakra can lead to¬†depression. Funny that!

Then it got really strange. He said that during the process he could see into my mind. Snapshots of memories. A look into my black box if you like. But not just of my life now. Nope, he said he could see into my past life as well. Now as¬†Hindus¬†we believe in reincarnation and in karma. What goes around, comes around…in this life or the next. But what he told me next was well spooky! He told me about the kind of person I had been in my past life. The things I had done and how it connected to my life now. Let’s just say I wasn’t a very nice man….yes I was a man.¬†Again I don’t want to go into specifics as its more personal then I would like to get but according to him the things that happened to me that subsequently dragged me deeper and deeper into a black hole over the last few years was quite simply¬†pay back¬†for the person I was then.

So you’re probably thinking why did I believe any of it? How can it be true? ¬†Well he knew stuff. Things about me from before and stuff that is happening now or in the next few weeks. There were links. Big ones. And things just seemed to make sense all of a sudden. He also added that things are about to start turning around and I’ve got good things ahead. So that made me feel better. Now this is not to say I’m now taking every word he said as gospel. Yes I do believe things happen for a reason but I also believe that we still have a certain amount of control over these so called things.

I think I’ve gone off on a bit of a tangent again haven’t¬†it?! I suppose where I’m going is that I’m finding comfort in this spiritual healing. The yoga, the meditation and now the reiki. All of them are about using our energy in different ways to bring us to a point of physical and mental stability and to connect us to the universe. It’s not for everyone and to be honest I never thought it was for me. But if it works then I’m going with it. As for the past life stuff. Well I often said to myself when I was going through my dark days that I must have been a terrible person in my previous life. How much truth there is in all of this I don’t know. But if it is true? Well, what more can I say except that karma most certainly is a b*tch!

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